13 Kick Ass Horror Flicks You Haven’t Seen
Here’s a list of some horror films that seem to fall under the radar of even the most rabid horror fan.
I wanted to post this list closer to Halloween, but as it goes I couldn’t find the time to actually write this one up. So here it is in all it’s glory. Why, you might ask, is the list at 13 instead of say 10 or 15? Well because when I thought of this topic 13 movies immediately sprung to mind. So there. This list is also not in any specific order. Enjoy, and Stay Bloody!!!
Please please please pay attention to the director and year this one came out. You don’t wanna end up getting one of the other “Joshua” flicks that are out there (there’s a total of 6 JOSHUA movies out there). But this version is definitely the most depraved and fucked up of the lot. Done on an estimated budget of $200,000 JOSHUA tells the story of a serial killer … or does it. There’s so much more going on here. Its a familiar set up: A guy returns to his hometown to attend a funeral, and once there he must confront his personal demons. But again, there’s so much more going on here. The secret here will sicken you and if your a parent will get under your skin and haunt you weeks after seeing it. Trust me.
Wow this is one twisted flick. Pair together a young, naive couple who move to a new town with a guy who’s hobbies include poisoning people and self-surgery and you get one sick fucking film. Director Whifler spares us no detail as we see the results of him poisoning the young couple, and you’ll be watching the self-surgery/masturbation scene with your mouth wide open. Don’t miss this one.
BAD BIOLOGY (2008); directed by Frank Henenlotter
Henenlotter came back onto the horror scene with a vengeance with this tale of sexual deformity and one woman’s search for the perfect guy who could keep up with her unique condition. Jennifer (Charlee Danielson) is a woman with 7 clits; Batz (Anthony Sneed) has a monstrous cock with a mind of its own (made monstrous through injecting steroids into it). They are each on their own paths to try an satiate their sexual hungers and you know it’s gonna be fucked up when they finally meet. Most of this film is simply beyond description and must be seen to be believed. Don’t miss this one.
BEHIND THE MASK: THE RISE OF LESLIE VERNON (2006); directed by Scott Glosserman
Even though this is the least gory of the films on my list, the punch this one packs is no less. This deconstructs both the slasher genre and the slasher killer himself. This is a really clever and scary film about a documentary crew following around Leslie Vernon, the next great serial killer. I love the world that Glosserman creates … one where Jason, Mike Myers, and Leatherface actually exist. Check this one out and find out just how fun and scary the slasher genre can really be.
This is must-see film if you missed it. On the one hand it’s an old-school slasher flick, and on the other hand it has tons of end of the world imagery and apocalyptic overtones. The story is brilliant and will keep you on the edge of your seat, and the gore is second to none. There are more than a few “show-stopper” moments. Don’t miss this one!!
LONG PIGS (2007); directed by Nathan Hynes & Chris Power
The second indie horror film to be on my list (the first being JOSHUA). LONG PIGS has the by now familiar set-up of a documentary crew following around a cannibalistic serial killer (played brilliantly by Anthony Alviano). What could have easily turned into a spoof of the genre ends up being an extremely insightful examination of a serial killer, his motives, and what makes him tick. And the scene where the crew takes the killer to interview his first victim’s father … well it will send chills up and down your spine. This is a great film that totally works.
Buckle up your seat belts and be prepared for a barrage of some of the most intense, violent, sadistic, and brutal scenes ever to be put on film. Two serial killers grab a video recorder and film their killing spree. That’s the plot. You will be disgusted; you will be sickened; and you will not forget this trilogy. You’ve been warned.
THE COTTAGE (2008); directed by Paul Andrew Williams
This is another of those mish-mash movies that combine two genres. This time it combines the kidnapping and the slasher genres and does it extremely well. Two guys kidnap the daughter of a mob boss hoping to get a huge ransom for her. Little did they know she is one of the most foul-mouthed pain-in-the-ass broad who won’t listen to a word they say. And to make matters worse, they take their victim to a remote location where the only other property around them is a cottage. And just wait until you see what’s waiting for them in that cottage!!
PONTYPOOL (2008); directed by Bruce McDonald
Perhaps the most original take on the zombie genre ever (even though they never use the word “zombie”). The fantastic Stephen McHattie is a shock jock in a remote radio station in Canada. Reports start slowly coming in about some kind of outbreak that’s causing people to become extremely violent and even kill each other. The brilliance here is that the viewer finds out the info the same time McHattie’s character does so we are in the dark just like the other characters are. Just wait till you find out what the cause of the “infection” is. This is one of the smartest horror flicks out there. Don’t miss it.
The French put their two cents in on the zombie genre and do it with great results. We follow around a couple as they try and contact the military in the “safe zone” to be rescued. But things don’t go exactly as planned. We get to see one of the couple bitten and slowly change into a “mutant.” Really good stuff here.
VINYAN (2008); directed by Fabrice Du Welz
This is one of those films that will crawl deep under your skin and stay there for a long time. Here we follow a couple as they search for their son who they thought died in the tsunami that hit many years ago. But while watching a documentary on the area, the wife believes she sees her son in the background. What follows is a nightmarish descent into the Thai-Burmese jungles. This is another one that isn’t very gory, but it will stay with you for a long time as we watch the couple’s sadness and guilt tear them and their sanity a part.
VINDICATION (2006); directed by Bart Mastronardi
Another indie horror flick that took a long time to get completed … but DAMN was it worth the wait. This is more of a psychological horror flick as we follow a young man who’s having a really horrible life. One day he finally just gives up and commits suicide but he can’t even do that right. He survives, but his failed suicide attempt results in his guilt becoming real and manifests in the world. This might be labeled a psychological horror film, but Mastronardi gives us a lot of truly terrifying images and some really fun gore. Don’t miss this one.
SWEATSHOP (2009); directed by Stacy Davidson
Wow I have a lot of indie horror films on my list. I saw SWEATSHOP at 2010’s Texas Frightmare Weekend and it absolutely stole the entire weekend. This is one gory (VERY gory) ride as we follow around a group of 20-somethings as they prepare a (supposedly) abandoned warehouse for a rave. But we all know its not abandoned; in fact it houses a fucking maniac who’s weapon in a huge steel pipe connected to a gigantic fucking anvil. And damn if he doesn’t use that thing often!!! This is a really fun slasher flick full of drugs, sex, titties, and lots and lots of gore. Seriously; a lot of gore.